Life & Love – Thought Changer

Life’s teachers are literally everywhere. If you’re looking. “Thank you, Teacher.” I had a beautiful conversation with a dear friend this week. We were working through something together, something that had found the space in our open hearts to discuss and resolve. Not the easiest thing for two people who avoid conflict. We’d made the commitment to one another years ago to be a safe place for telling the truth, for pushing each other to dig deeper, and after this conversation, we’re closer than ever. We also talked about how challenging relationships and situations often are our greatest teachers. She reflected on her children, how they have taught her to be a better parent, and often it wasn’t the sunshine and roses moments that elevated her skills. It was the resistance, the conflict, the smart pushback and exchanges from and with her engaged, independent kids. Because she does the inner… Read more →

“You’re changing that boy’s life.” “No, he’s changing mine.” from a scene in the film, “THE BLIND SIDE” I recently watched the movie again (and again), and was once again entranced not only by the transformational journey of football great Michael Oher, but equally by the how helping him also changed the lives of his adoptive family, Sean and Leanne Tuohy and their two kids. And, while the film focused primarily on Michael’s story and Leanne’s crusade to give him a leg up on life, on closer examination much of the real-life story began with Sean Tuohy’s personal vision to help poor Memphis kids when they needed it. And, although they went the whole ten yards with Michael Oher, he was not the first, nor the last who received an outstretched hand from Sean Tuohy. It got me thinking once again about how having a clear vision brings so much… Read more →

“The key to change…is to let go of fear.” ~ Rosanne Cash I posted this quote on my social media this week and this question came back: How do you do that? It got m e thinking about fear and how just the very mention of the word can stop us in our tracks sometimes. FEAR. It can stop us from making decisions, or from taking advantage of an opportunity that puts us out of our comfort zone. The very notion of fear can cause inertia which is not helping you, or anyone for that matter. It’s helpful to re-define scary terms, to think about them in a new way. Some people define fear as False Evidence Appearing Real, in other words fear isn’t real. And, there is truth to that sentiment. But, when you’re in the middle of a fear it feels pretty darn real. Here are two new… Read more →

There was a magnificent rainbow out my kitchen window recently. It was one of those breathtaking ones where you could see the entire thing from beginning to end. We’d been hit with torrents in Los Angeles; and, this hopeful vista was an organic reminder that there is an end to the storm; it represents a gateway to things better and brighter. It got me thinking about how “Rainbow Thinking” in terms of career, and life for that matter, might go along way toward keeping us focused on what matters. I bloody love metaphors and rainbows are the mother lode. Stop and think about it for a moment. What do rainbows mean to you? Some may say it’s just a sign the rain has stopped. Well, even that simple statement is full of metaphor if you’ll let yourself go there. Other rainbow meanings that come to mind: it’s a sign of… Read more →

Okay, there are many reasons why I love British Actor Colin Firth. I won’t bore you with most of them (wink), but a recent quote of his on a TV interview got me thinking. He said, “You get a brand attached to you sometimes whether you invite it or not.” He was referring to how he will probably always be thought of in terms of the iconic role he played, Mr. Darcy, in BBC’s “Pride and Prejudice.” It haunted him in his earlier career. It got me thinking that, even if we’re not aware of it, even if we never utter the words, we all have a brand of one sort of another. So, what’s all this talk about personal brand? Brand shmand. It’s definitely a big buzz word out there in the ether, and arguably an overused one. But, since you already have one, you might as well know… Read more →

“Words, words, words; I’m so sick of words,” were the lyrics sung by Audrey Hepburn in My Fair Lady, which I watched on AMC not too long ago. Her disdain was in sharp contrast with Professor Higgins’ obsessive love of words. This got me thinking about my lifelong love affair with words and the responsibility that comes along with that. I recently saw motivational speaker and author Les Brown address a group of businesswomen. Les skillfully speaks in quotable sound bites and uses words better than many for inspiring people to take action in their own lives. What he had to say about using your words effectively was this, “Never let what you want to say get in the way of what they need to hear.” Bravo. A recent discussion thread on one of the Linkedin groups stemmed from the question, “What 3 words best describe you?” The answers were… Read more →

Let’s begin the year with an admission. I like themes. What can I say, I’m one of those sad sacks who likes (pause for effect) theme parties. I’ve been known, in years past, to host nerd parties, dress-like-your-favorite-dead-celebrity parties, mystery dinner parties, bad prom/bridesmaid dress parties, etc. That scary confession aside, I do think it’s effective to give yourself a theme for the year. In good storytelling the theme is the through line from which the main message is derived, or the main questions are answered. When it’s a successful theme all key aspects of the story connect back, in large or small measure, to that premise. When you give yourself an annual theme it becomes a touchstone statement for you to keep coming back to all year allowing your intentions to remain alive. My annual themes invariably have to do with either a mantra that motivates me, an area… Read more →

This is a whirlwind time of year when it feels like we can’t cram one more thing into our holiday infused schedules. There was a story on CBS Sunday Morning this week about the world of nutcrackers, which will be forever associated with Christmas due to the ageless Tchaikovsky classic, The Nutcracker Suite. Nutcrackers used to be placed on the dinner table for the final course of the meal, the nuts. This is where the phrase “from soup to nuts” came from. It got me thinking about my own soup-to-nuts this year. And, wow what a feast of activity it’s been! When things get to be so busy every year at this time, it’s easy to get lost in the minutiae of the to-do list instead of taking stock and appreciating everything you’ve accomplished in the last 12 months. A dear friend reminded me of this last week as a… Read more →

I got an email from a woman who said the message from last week’s ezine hit her inbox at just the right time because she was going through some of the same issues I addressed in the article. I get similar emails each week, which is beyond gratifying because it’s reason I started sending them in the first place! But, it really got me thinking about common grounds. Finding common ground with people is the impetus for creating valuable relationships. Our commonalities are what make us accessible and relatable. The common ground is the equalizer. It tethers a connection with a person or people for the moment, the meeting, the present, or perhaps the future. “The longer we listen to one another – with real attention – the more commonality we will find in all our lives. That is, if we are careful to exchange with one another life stories… Read more →

“I think your self emerges more clearly over time.” ~ Meryl Streep What a difference a year makes. My head is spinning today, my mind full of reflection, introspection, jubilation, anticipation, wonder and… trepidation! Now, admittedly right now the trepidation part is minimized by the other more effusive emotions and thoughts. But, every year on my birthday – yes it’s today – I spend some good time reflecting, etc. Where have I come? Have I done what I set out to do in my life in my life and career? Am I the kind of person I’m meant to be? Am I on the right path? What’s the meaning of life?! …and so on! But, this year the trepidation is much different than it was a year ago. The trepidation this year is more about being a year closer to fifty! And, I would re-phrase it as an “anxious anticipation”… Read more →

“I am careful not to confuse excellence with perfection. Excellence I can reach for; perfection is God’s business.” ~ Michael J. Fox Read more →